make me a sandwich!

Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

What did the cop say to the robber? You have the right to remain silent

A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

What happens if someones forgets to put the 'anti' next to 'joke.' It is taken by someone else and created into an anti Joke.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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