Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

What did Pikachu say to Charmander? Nothing. Pokemon are fictional creatures, and thus, do not exist.

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

Q:Why did the old man die? A:Because he had Cancer in his hole body.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... whats worst than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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