You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

i hate black people

Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

how do jews pay for a $1200 Tv. they play $1000.

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up you retarded poet!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

What do you call a Mexican who likes to eat burritos? A Mexican

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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