You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

You mothers so ghetto, you died.

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

You might be a redneck. Sorry.

why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

Person 1:why did the person fart Person 2: wh.... Person 1:shut up I'm not interested any more! Btw person 2 got interrupted

How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...