Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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vaginas are pretty!!!!

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops