Bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why doesn't the Mexican belong in St. Louis? A: Because he ran away from home, his family lives in Kansas City.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you cross a spoon and a fork? A spoon crossed with a fork.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

look at the top of your screen. now look down. I MADE YOU DO THAT

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happens when lady gaga and chris brown jump into the pool at the same exact time. They get wet

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why couldn't the blind man drive? His sight impairment made him unable to fulfill the task without harming himself and potentially other people.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks up to a girl and says "Hello there" The girl doesn't respond because she has been deaf and blind for her entire life and doesn't know he is there. Potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the apple say to the pear? Fred, you are going insane and i'm getting a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I bit a horses leg. Why? Because I thought i was a vampire. I also bit my sisters glodfish in half.. Why? Cause I wanted revenge on my sister.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops