If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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What happens when you leave Toby alone in your house? He eats your carpet, some pillows, ur dog, ned, neds dog and a glass panel. This is why 2 +h = plugger +Mount Everest (I is potato annoying). Bonjour.

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

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I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

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Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

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What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

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What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Q:How many pancakes can you fit on top of as doghouse? A:Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.....

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Billy and Suzy sitting in a tree... Billy is gay.

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Who is it?

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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