A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

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Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

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A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

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A dog walks into a bar and the bartender gives him a bowl of water because it is hot outside and he doesn't want the dog to dehydrate because he could die.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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Sixty... eight

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Why did the kid get hit by the bus? He was in the road.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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When life gives you lemons, you're probably at Mr. Life's fruit stand over on Imperial Avenue.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

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Your future.

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whats blue and can fly? a red robin i lied about being blue By RT so u believe me

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Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

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So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests Testicals

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If you see a pink banana, you are color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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