What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

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Know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

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A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

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hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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Four men were walking, and three of them walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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Top 10 Signs You Might Be Lonely and in Need of a Friend 10. Your closest friend has a skull tattooed on his knuckles and goes by the nickname bruiser. 9. You are becoming a little too fond of chess and pocket protectors. 8. You parents complain that your friends are a "Pack of wild chickens"-and it's not a figure of speech. 7. You follow your mailman around in hopes of a good conversation. 6. A cop pulls you over for speeding, and you add him to your Chistmas card list. 5. Your equation for a snappy party = TV remote + bean dip. 4. You forward e-mail jokes to yourself regularly. 3. You six best friends are Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Rachel. 2. You've named all of your roaches. 1. Phone solicitors hang up on you!

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Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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If a white person and black person have a baby, what colour is the baby? Grey

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

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What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

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Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

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Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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