how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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