your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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The Barackness Monster

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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How do you kill a blonde? There are countless ways to complete such a task all of which have infinite variations.

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Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

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How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

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what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Louis. Louis? Go away!!! Your jokes are so bad! Geez, you guys really don't like me. GET OUT!!! (Door slams; Louis shuffles away with a sad look on his face) -Louis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops