A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

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A man violently raped a small child. Unfortunately the child had aids and gave them to the man.

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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Mitt Romney

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

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Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

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Why did the boat salesman cry? Because a puppet killed his family.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

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Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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How do you stop clowns from throwing cinderblocks at your car? Hire a hitman.

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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I like it in the butt. - Tyler James Nehring. Call me if you want to give me the d. 863-670-1547

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knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

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a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a donkey

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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