whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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want to hear a dirty joke tommy fell in the mud a clean joke he took a bath with bubbles bubbles was his neighbor

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A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

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No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Why did the banana rot? Because it didn't have any gills.

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Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Yo Mama!

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What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

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What is the same about fries chicken and watermelon? There both delicious.

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Why does a black man have a bicycle? He bought it with his own money.

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Why did Tiarnan not ride is bike to school today. Tiarnan's dead.

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

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which one does not belong light bulb i have read an agree to the terms of service view terms of service submit

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Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

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Why was the Mexican in pain? Someone hit him with a frying pan 5 times across the face.

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Your mom is so old that she has a lot of wrinkles because that's what happens to people when they get old.

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There's a black, afghan, and a rhabi. Which one is Obama?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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