A man walks into a bar and says "ouch".

Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

Where was the black child's dad? At work. He'll be back around 6:30

Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

Tell you something funny.

Q: Wy did the Araib cross the road? A: To open another gas station.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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