Excuse me, do you happen to have the time? No.

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A man comes home to find his wife in bed with another man. He then joins them.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Alzheimer who? Knock knock.

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A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

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Guy 1: Hey, did you hear about this blind guy who went bungee jumping off a bridge? Guy 2: No, what happened? Guy 1: He couldn't see Jack!

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Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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knock knock no ones home

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Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

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Have you ever heard about the black man who got shot my a goat? Neither did I.

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The Pittsburgh Pirates

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Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

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it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

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Justin Bieber.

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Who wants pizza crusts?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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