if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

My kids are mistakes.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 42

why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

A girl gets raped -teagan d

Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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