Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Im Black And I Will Beat You Children At Checkers,They Can Be Red

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what's white and goes up? a retarded snowflake

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

thumb_up thumb_down +12

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the convicted felonist come back to America? He lost his passport.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did mr smith say when a student asked for math help? ok

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the same between a school bus and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I like to slap biitches, I like to slap hoes

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is the chicken dead? It tried to cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how hight is a china man ? derr his name is how high and he is a china man

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

200,000 people are homeless! ...this year in america!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +12

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops