What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

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I may have alzheimers...Thank god I dont have alzheimers

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Howdid we get copper piping we put a Pennie between two Jules

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What did the French-Italian couple name their child? Angelo Pierre Smith, giving tribute to the father's uncle Angelo, and the mother's great-grandfather, Pierre.

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A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

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A little boy ran to the pool to see how long he could hold his breath. He slipped and fractured his skull.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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Q.what does the kid scream when he see's a creepy man in a big van pull up? A. ICE CREAM!

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

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A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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what's black and white? everything. i'm a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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