What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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PATHETIC

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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