Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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Two elephants walk off of cliff.... BOOM BOOM!

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What do you call a person mowing a lawn? A Mexican

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why did the blond walk in to a door because she was not paying attention

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

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What is the saddest thing in a porno? He doesn't really love her.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

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A black guy walks into a bar... *3 hours later* He walks out...

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Fucked thinking zero out of sub level -1 I hate Black Mexican Jews Born in China! But that does not make me a racist! I insist I am not a racist, there exists only two of them and they are both assholes... ...Or is that racist? :S NeroMetal: The ONLY Moralman aka the most pointless man in history not the "leader of Neronist whatever fuck I raped and killed that Faqq0t murderer, no fucking "Church Of Nero" There is no code embedded here... ...Or is that racist?:S

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Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side of his body? He has been taken to hospital and is in a critical state where his right side of his body can not be joined together. This is life threatning and he is now not able to walk

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Yo mama so fat, her whole family is encouraging her to exercise and go on a diet.

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When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

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What's better than Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels Jr.

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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What did the peanut say to the jelly

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What's the difference between an orange? A bycicle you fool, a vest doens't have sleeves

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Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

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Why are black people not allowed to play football? They are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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