Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

child labor

What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

Butt Sex.

Ben: do you want to hear a joke. jack: yh go on then, i bet its funny. Ben: Your future.

What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

#Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Catherine of Aragon was one. # She failed to give him a son #He had to ask her for a divorce. #That broke her poor heart of course. #Young Anne Boleyn, she was two #Had a daughter, the best she could do #He said she flirted with some other man #And off with the chop, went dear Anne! #Lovely Jane Seymour was three! #The love of his lifetime indeed! #She gave him a son #Little Price Ed #Then poor old Jane...went and dropped dead! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! #He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Anne of Cleeves came at four #He fell for the portrait he saw! #But laid eyes on her face, and cried #SHE'S A HORSE! I MUST HAVE ANOTHER DIVORCE! #Catherine Howard was five #A child of nineteen, so alive #She flirted with others, no way to behave #The AXE sent young Cath to her grave! #Catherine Parr, she was last #By then all his best days were past #He lay on his death bed, aged just fifty-five! #Lucky Catherine- the last stayed alive! #I mean, how unfair! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #You could say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! And the moral of the story is: Never buy a car without knowing it's background.

What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

A black guy gets a job...

why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

An Asian walks into a bar, but the bartender asks him to leave the bartender replies "we're closing soon" but he secretly harbored racist views that he had not yet come to terms with and was deeply ashamed of.

What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

Billy was so silly that he named his pet zebra Spot.

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

Penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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