Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? we will never know he never opened it

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man is on a date. His philandering causes a bitter divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

WHY DO JEWS HATE GERMANY? THEY DON'T THEY FORGAVE THE NAZIS :-) ( . )( . ) -------

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -5

bees knees

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I LIKE TRAINS

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

thumb_up thumb_down -7

i drive all the time its no big deal open the door and get behind the wheel

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops