How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

politically correct!

What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's alright now.

What's the difference between a Justin Beiber concert and a hedgehog? With a hedgehog, the pricks are on the outside, but in a Justin Beiber concert, the pricks are on the inside.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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