A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

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whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four in the seats, twenty six in the ash tray, and thirty in the gas chamber.

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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What do you call a blind man on a jet ski? Dead.

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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Do you like your life? No. OK.

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How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Compton

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

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Whats worse than a gay pride parade? Genocide.

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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