How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Justin's humor

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A midget walks under a bar

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Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

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A man walks outside on a sunny day. Since the sun was very bright, he put on a pair of sunglasses. While this was going on, nothing else really happened and he went on with his day as usual.

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Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

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What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

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A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

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How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

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Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

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where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

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What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops