question:How do you call a Russian with Ak47. answer: Spetznaz

What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

Has anyone seen that clown that hides from gay people in Tesco's

my uncle tommy is super religious. last month he's walking down the street, he gets mugged and shot in the chest. now miraculously (and i mean miraculously), he always keeps a bible in his left chest pocket. and he had something to read as he bled to death.

A Russian who dosen't like vodka

what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

So, same time tomorrow then?

If i was a painting... Id hang myself

Q:What do you call a bird with wings? A:A bird -Ryan Vallee

why did the bus crash the driver was an alcoholic and was drunk he killed 8 people upon impact.

What's funnier than 68 69

Why was timmy in the well? He had autism.

I'm gonna say something that is going to blow you(away). My Rape Dungeon has carpet.

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

Q: why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A: because it was dead

I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a porsche? i don't have i dead baby in my garage. That would be wrong

What does a black person use to chop a tree down? An Ask.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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