Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

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What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Justin Bieber's Never Say Never 3D came out the other day. I went to see it, and it was a pretty good movie.

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Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

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Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

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Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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what did meredith and nick have in common an i

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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