Why did the chicken cross the road? 24

Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

Whats the most common use of a butt plug after school? In the sport of pole vaultIng, the butt plug is the rubber end of the pole that is designed to withstand the force of being planted in a steel box.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

NOTICE: If you have noticed this notice then you will have noticed this notice is not worth being noticed

Why did the Jew rob the bank? -He was a criminal.

suck my balls mr.garison

A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Bill:What do you get when you cross a panda and an eagle? Joe:I don't know what? Bill: Is that even possible?

Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

Why aren't 4 black people driving a red mustang? They can't afford it.

Gorden Brown.

A car enters a curve. An ice-cream man pops out from a manhole and throws a pine cone to the car.

Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

Jews

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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