What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How can you tell if a duck is sleeping? Look at its eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

thumb_up thumb_down -8

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

thumb_up thumb_down -8

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why do girls not have penises? Because there girls

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's 9+10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Steve Jobs dead, but Bill Gates isn't? Because Bill Gates wasn't diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the boy stuck? He's under a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

thumb_up thumb_down -10

God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the blond become a lawyer? She didnt. After many years of collage and studying, she broke down and quit, and became a stripper.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops