what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q:Why did the cop arrest the black guy with a gun? A: because he shot a family and when the funeral was held he cooked a grenade killed everyone and peed on there grave, later he rapped two dogs and stabbed a crippled then tea bagged a horse to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Abbott! Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door! The door was never answered because they did not know the person at the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken go up the car? To get a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

thumb_up thumb_down +11

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock! *no answer* KNOCK KNOCK! *still no answer* the person who was knocking finds a note sticked on the door and it says: i will be away for 2 weeks

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Want to hear the best joke? Your life :,( i think i hate you?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was Jimmy upset? There is a frog taped to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops