O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

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A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

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Womens rights.

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A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

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She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

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why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

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How long would it take for a clock to reach 12 It depends on which 12 it is going to land on and which time zone you are in but yet most clocks are not correct so it is very hard to tell

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Civil Rights.

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Why did the lonely man stop talking? He was alone.

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A Black man and a Hispanic man were sitting in the back seat of a car. Who was driving? Their Asian friend who offered to take them to get lunch.

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you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

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How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

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have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christimas? A: Cancer.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

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what is the difference between a park bench and a black guy? the park bench is an inanamite object and doesn't have feelings

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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