what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

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Girls got to Jupiter to get more stupider. Boys go to Mars to build a sophisticated civilization.

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

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A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

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Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

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Why did the plane crash? The pilots had brain damage.

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There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

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KKK

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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What does a black person use to chop a tree down? An Ask.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

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how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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