what's shaped like a tree? a tree

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

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what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

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Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What has one eye, three arms and one leg? A really weird person.

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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Want to here a joke? Then get off this site!

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I can't see my forehead

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Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

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Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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