A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

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Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

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(kid is eating a round fruit) friend: Get me an apple too. Kid: I wish I could The kids friend later realizes that his friend was actually eating a peach.

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? I'm sorry your brother died

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

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A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

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What's better than sex? Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call a dead blond in a coset? Last years hide and seek winner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm asking, really... ..come on, someone has to know...

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Why was the Asian so good at ping-pong? Disciprine.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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What's the diffrence between one black guy and another black guy. One of them has Aids.

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Halo < COD

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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Suddenly the Titanic started sinking, its a shame it sunk before anyone managed to find out what it was sinking about.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops