A man walks into a bar what does he say Ouch

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

How did the priest die? Masterbation

-When is a door not a door? -Never

Boy: Mum... I got a hundred marks! Mother: That's good my son! Which subject was it? Boy: 30 for maths, 40 for english, and 30 for science.

A man walks into a bar. ouch.

Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

*you're

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

Male penises.

What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

911 joke ? now thats just plane rude.

How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

An Asian gets into her car to drive to her grandmother's house. She arrives at 6:30 and has a wonderful dinner.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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