what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Gentlemen, when she says no, she always means yes. Unless, of course, your rhetoric is of a sexual nature.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did man who had diarrhea say to the other man? "I have to go to the toilet."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The government

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops