"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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