Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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Japan

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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