Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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swag

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

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why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

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What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops