Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

The awkward when you said moment in your head.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

What is the difference between a dog and a North Korean tank. When I see a dog I think wow, what a cute dog. When I see a North Korean tank I run away screaming, as do many others, and I hope the marines come and save us.

The

How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

milly, milly, milly, cat

A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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