What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

tim has no humor

what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

How do you blind an Asian man You stab him six times in each eye socket and drop cyan pepper in his eye wound.

What do you call 17 blondes standing in a row? most certainly not Charles because it seems as though it would be incrediblely unlikley that a girl would be named Charles

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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