Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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What's funnier than 1 dead baby? Anything

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Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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Why did the homeless man steal food from the local grocery store? He had not eaten in three days and was forced to steal or risk possible starvation.

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

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What's the difference between a bike and a black man? I don't know how to ride a bike.

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A: Knock knock B:The door is open.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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What is not funny Bad jokes!????

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When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

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Why is a T-shirt like a topaz statue of the Archangel Gabriel? They both start with 'T'.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops