Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by a fridge. Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she got hit by a fridge. Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because it had no face.

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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What do you call Americans Watching Canadians? Hockey

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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Boxing on Boxing Day

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Some home health supplies. He really needed them, too.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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Q. Why did Justin Beiber fall off the ladder? A. He was trying to reach puberty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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