What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? No. Yeah, he died.

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my wife out of the kitchen

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

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How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

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Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

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A black man has 100 problems. on his AP calculus test.

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What do you call 4 black men in a BMW? Successful Businessmen.

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What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Why did the plane crash? Because, it's pilot was a bagel.

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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