Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

TIMMY

A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

What do you call a white man takeing orders from a black man? Batman and robin

Why did the Egg turn Purple Because it didnt turn blue.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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