life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

White NBA players.

Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

your momma's so stupid, she starved to death in a supermarket i probably would too...considering all the good shit needs to be cooked

What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

The child was fired from his job.

What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

"What the hell is wrong with you?" "..."

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

Jesus Christ

what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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