A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

A dyslexic man into bar walks a.

Who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? The same Griffin Kid.

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by a giant elephant.

Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

Your text.

I saw 2 cannibals eating a clown. What did I do? Called the local police.

A horse walks into a bar. The waiter asks: 'Why the long face?' The horse, not understanding English, takes a crap on the floor and walks out.

1

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

What Do Yu Call 2 gay guys? Tyquan And Dnautica

what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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