How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

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c======3

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Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

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Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

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What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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