Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick!

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Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

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What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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What was the baker a coward? He didn't have the "Bunz" to prove it!

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

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Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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roy g biv

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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