What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

Why do i have no likes? Because im disliked...

Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because Martin Handford drew him that way to make him unique and distinguishablefrom the hundreds of other drawn people (and animals) in the pages of the children's game book, which incidentally is known as Where's Wally in numerous non-USA countries.

Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

how would you feel when your girlfriend dumps you really bad because she just dumped you man!!!1

q- what do you call a small number of black people running away from a large group of white people? a- every marathon known to man...

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

A black man walks into a bar. No comments were said to him for everyone else was paying attention to their other peers.

What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

Knock, Knock Who's There? An Orange No Seriously Who Are You?

Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

whats worse than getting no gifts for christmas? getting hit by a bus for christmas

What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

Is it normal to eat breakfastr in the morning? Yes By Logan in South Dakota

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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