What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

You

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

???????????? WTF?

How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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