A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

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what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

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Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

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What is worse then finding a worm in your apple!? Getting raped!

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Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

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Whats an Anti Joke

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What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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What did the doctor say to the camel with no hump? You're a horse.

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What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

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whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

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Why does an actor enjoy his work so much? Because it’s all play.

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What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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