What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

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In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

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Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

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THE GAME

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When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

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What do you say to a hamster? 42 and weasels

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dont you love porch monkeys? no.

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

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What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

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Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

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What is worse than running away from a rapist? Getting raped by a rapist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Religious fanatics: WE MUST NOT SIN! Jesus: And I died for their sins? They do not even try a bit of sex and rock and roll? Now that is a sin :( I died for nothing then :( Religious fanatics: Damn!

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a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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